Escapades of the wierd kind...

And I swear the below is the absolute truth and nothing but the truth.

So I live in Chennai….good old Madras..whose name was changed to Chennai cos it was someone’s dumb idea to do so! I did so love the name Madras and it’s still known as Madras in ayal-naadu..YAY!! :) As you may know (or not know) it’s the fifth most populous city in all of Mera Bharath Mahaan and therefore you can imagine the state of traffic – to put it bluntly – it’s TERRIBLE!! And this terrible traffic is managed by – who else? – the traffic police (CCTP). And its thanks to these guys – one nice uncle in particular – that I have my driver’s license intact today!

Picture this – 4 a.m. in the morning..and I’ve snuck out of my house on the pretext of being on (very) early shift at work that day (thank the lord for BPO’s). In truth I was on the way to pick up my boy-friend who’s arriving from another city (I won’t say which – that might give a clue to my true identity). A soooper day was planned starting with breakfast in Residency Towers (absolutely yummy cheese omelets), wake the rest of my friends, 10:30 show at Sathyam, late lunch at Basera on ECR…but then I drift from my subject. So off at 4:00 a.m. after one soodu cup of Bru Instant coffee. Empty roads all the way thru with the exception of a few lorries and the BPO taxi-vandi's. Ha!! Peaceful drive down Mount Road (first time ever!!). I know I have to take a left at the end of that oh-so-long-road that runs thru-out the city....the thing is, I’m never sure of which left leads to the station – I mean I’m not sure of it when its dark – can’t see properly you know – because its dark and NOT bcos I’m blind!!! So I switched on the indicator on my car and almost took the left and then figured out it wasn’t the correct one and just kept going straight…which was WHEN I felt this bump on the rear! Checked the mirror and there was this auto that was kavundhufied on the road….

Needless to stay stupid me pulled over beneath the bridge (Chennaiites will know which bridge I refer to) and ran along to check. This guy comes crawling out and is gasping “haiyoo...moochu vida mudiyale, naan sethukittu irukken (basically I’m dying types!)”. I freaked!!! Tried calling my friends (can’t call dad cos he’ll know then that Ivittufied abt early shift n all) and the morons were hungover and barely coherent! By the time I hung up (which was less than 2 minutes) I was surrounded by a bunch ofautokaaran’s – and sathyama theriyathu where they came from! Not another soul on the road too! And no prizes for guessing what they wanted -dhuddu. I said “In my car wait…” and ran off, got in, started ignition and took off towards the station. They chased me…for a second I thought I was in the middle of aTelengu padam and even pinched myself. But no...it was happening alright. The thugs caught up with me at the signal opposite the railway station and made me stop.

Nalla velai a very kind and benevolent policeman came up and said…”Enna prachane paa inge” and I said “Sir! Uncle!Intha auto came and banged me from behind and is demanding money”…everyone started shouting about how it was my fault – AND IT WASN’T – and our man told the autokaaran's who weren’t involved to bugger off. Yippeee!! Then he told me “These guys wont leave without taking money so give something and I’ll send them away” – shelled out Rs 200 (which was ALL I had) and thankfully went into Chennai Central – late by abt 10 mins - but eternally grateful to CCTP.

My boyfriend had already left.